State of Being: Thoughts From an Out-of-State Student

By Ellie Younger February 11, 2020

I have always been a big believer in the idea that university is for exploration – of the planet, and of the mind. While it isn’t appealing for everyone, moving 2,000-plus miles to begin my college career granted me the adventure I desired. There is something to be said about leaving your home and everyone you know armed with the statement, “See you in four months” and a couple of suitcases weighing less than 50 pounds. I felt free to reinvent myself in my new zip code, free to start over, free to be truly independent.

I knew that moving would be challenging, but I greatly underestimated the immense discomfort that comes with such a lingering feeling of loneliness. I got through the blue days by constantly reminding myself what I would get out of this experience; new friends, professional opportunities, a wider world view, and a well-renowned education. It wasn’t comfortable, but I put myself in a difficult position in order to orchestrate the most growth.

I’ve been here since August, so I’ll admit there are some things I love about my new home and some I’m not sure I will ever accept. To me, it will always be soda not pop, sinsta not finsta, highway not expressway. I spent the first month amazed by the sheer magnitude of ranch dressing consumed by my peers, learning people’s homes by their location on a palm, and generally feeling like I was floating in between multiple destinations.

Desperate to plant new roots, it seemed that every place I spent a night at became a home. Seeking solace in every mention of Portland, I attached my identity to my origin in order to not forget where I came from. My bones ached for trees, my soul for mountains, my lungs for the sea, but gradually I adjusted, realizing the wonderful duality of my existence.

I am able to call all of these places my home without betrayal towards any location that built who I am today. I am learning about the world, and growing my own view in the most exciting way.

I discovered how best to plant my feet so not to slide in the ice, and I will never take for granted the days where the sun shines while it snows. I am surrounded by charming Midwesterners who offer to take me in at any holiday break, and I’m enjoying the benefits of East Coast time. All in all, I truly could not be more grateful that I ended up in this beautiful, snowy, mitten-shaped state.

 

Ellie
Ellie Younger

Ellie Younger is a sophomore in the College of Literature, Science, and the Arts and plans to study Biopsychology, Cognition and Neuroscience. Ellie volunteers with the Sexual Assault Prevention and Awareness Center (SAPAC) and is happy to have found her U-M community in the club Survivor Michigan, for which she is an HR executive. She loves hiking in her home state of Oregon, conversations about social justice, and good poetry.